Building Trust

My oldest daughter was given a gift from a friend. I asked her why her friend gave it to her and if this friend has ever given her anything before. She said the friend gave it to her because the friend didn't want it anymore.

I beg your pardon?

I asked what it was used for since I'm clueless when it comes to anime. She explained vaguely but something in my spirit was not settled.

I did my research.

After some time I went back to her so we could talk. I wanted to give her another opportunity to be honest. This time she was. I asked her why she lied to me the first time but I already knew it was because she wanted to keep the gift. She just shrugged her shoulders. I told her everything has energy and I've said it before that I don't want them (her and her sister) taking anything from anyone. I told her some people don't mean well- even someone you consider a friend. For the record I know her other friends. It is just something about this one that I can't figure out just yet so I have to trust my intuition. We've all had a friend that our parent/ parents were not fond of and later found out they were right. They saw something we didn't see at the time. I also told her I could be wrong about this friend but the fact that she felt she had to lie to me is the point I was making that her friend could've lied to her about where she got it from and why she gave it to her.

I told her even if she got over on me that could just open her up for someone to possibly get over on her and that's not what she wants.

I reminded her that if she wants something she can ask her dad or I.

In the end we hugged and kissed and I told her I want to make sure she is safe even when she thinks I'm just being extra. I reminded her that I love her. And she will not always like my choices but I have her and her sister's best interest at heart always.

This was a learning experience for both of us.

I question whether or not she gets where I'm coming from at times. I’m willing we find balance between a healthy curiosity and support.

How do you view trust? Are you automatically trusting of others it until you see otherwise? Or it is something that others have to earn from tbr beginning?

Be well.