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Role Model

Updated: Nov 7, 2023

From as far back as I could remember writing was my favorite thing in school. I liked reading for a short while too. That was before my first grade teacher [i’ll call] Ms. C made me stand up in front of the class every day to read out loud. I didn't like it, my nerves were bad and by the time I got to college I blamed my fear of public speaking on her.


That lady stressed me out but I forgave her. In all honesty I wasn't the only one. We all had our fair share of time to read out loud. I remember it like it was yesterday. I can see little ol me... standing next to her desk that always had piles of black and white marble notebooks on it. I'm in my blue plaid uniform jumper trying not to fumble my words and hoping she wasn't listening. But she always listened. Even when she was grading homework with that red pen that never ran out of ink, telling the boys to stop doing whatever boys did and watching the rest of the class over the brim of her glasses.


Ms. C never let me skip or pronounce a word wrong. I hated it. I can say it now because I'm grown but boy was that year the longest ever. I was too sensitive and everything she did seemed aggressive and just too much but I learned the most there. I really developed a love for books then even though I would never tell her that.


It's funny how something so uncomfortable could turn into something so rewarding. This is not the case in every situation of course. I think you know what I mean here.


Some people only know one way of doing things and some people don't want to try anything different. My first grade teacher probably learned the same way that she taught us. When I was a teacher I was observant of anxious behaviors and tried to accommodate different learning styles. I too wanted to be a good teacher but I didn't want to traumatize anyone in the process. I chose to go a softer route because children don't learn very well from people they don't like. And people in general do better when they know you actually care about them.


A part of the reason that I blog is because I really enjoy sharing what I know that can be helpful for others and I love to write. So it works for me. When I write, I want people to feel comfortable reading my post and a little entertained too because I love a good laugh. I think if learning was more fun when I was younger I would have branched out into different subjects. However I am at peace with knowing that I made it out of grade school ok and now I can talk about it.


Now, thanks to the internet and the ability to share and have access to soul enriching content I definitely feel like this is my lane. My hope is that you will find something within this space that you like, love or can apply to your life in some way.

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Anusa is an avid reader and loves to write. When she is not studying, or talking about astrology you can find her out and about in NYC with her family. 

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